"Who Told You That You Were Fat?"

“Amy, who told you that you were fat?”

I remember hearing this after I read Genesis 3:11 for the first time.  

In this passage, Adam and Eve are hiding from God.

They knew that they had messed up after eating the forbidden fruit, so they hid.

God says, “Where are you?”

Adam says, “I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid.”

God then answers, “Who told you that you were naked?”

No one told me I was fat.

I did hear, “big boned” and “chubby”, but never fat.

Somewhere at a tender young age, I heard a voice tell me I was fat.

And I believed it.

Where did this condemning, dark, demeaning and insulting voice come from?

Not God.

At a young age, I believed the voice of a traitor, the voice of a liar.

I continued believing this voice for much of my life.

In fact, this voice led me down a path that would destroy the majority of my life.

It wasn’t until I was near death that a different Voice, a stronger Voice, spoke through the depths of my disaster and downfall, shouting, “No. No more. She’s MINE.”

I have spent many years trying to forget the voice of the enemy.

Every day I decide, sometimes over and over, second by second, which voice I will follow.

Some days, I follow the wrong voice.

Some days, I allow the manipulative, screeching, piercing, often masked by glitter and eloquence, voice to dominate.

And then….

I believe that I will never get married.

I believe that I am not talented enough for music.

I believe that I am not thin enough, pretty enough, young enough.

Sometimes it’s easier to believe the lies over the truth.

And yet, without fail, every single time, before I get too far gone, another Voice emerges, beckoning me to stop, and reconsider what I have been considering.  

“Amy, who told you that were never going to get married?”

“Amy, who told you that you were not beautiful?”

“Amy, who told you that you were not talented enough?”

“Amy, who told you that you were not amazing?”

I don’t know what voices you are hearing right now.

I don’t know what voice you have been following.

Maybe it is the voice much like the one that I hear.

Maybe like me, everyday is a battle to turn your ear towards the right Voice.

Maybe like me, you sometimes follow the wrong voice.

Maybe like me, you need to stop, and go back to the very beginning.

Go back to Genesis.

Go back to the only One who knows you, created you, formed you, breathed life into you, and charted all the days of your life.

Go back to the One who loves you.

Go back to the One who knows the Truth.

Go back to the One who is the Truth.

“Who told you that you were ____?”